we get to choose

Yesterday I was in a quandary about which way to go about a situation. I had to make a decision and one seemed a worse option than the other. It was not about a big life-changing situation either. As I was struggling with which way to go, I paused and realised I was so lucky to have the choice. To be in the position to have the opportunity to choose. If we are lucky enough to get to make our choices every day, often simple ones about how to go about our days, how to spend our time, that's to be appreciated.

You can Make Someone's Day

in an easy effortless way by paying a heartfelt compliment. The other day I was surprised by something wonderful written to me by an old classmate. It totally made my day. She took the time to write something beautiful to me and I appreciate that so much. I kept thinking about what she wrote during the day and ever since then sometimes it just pops in my mind. If you like something about someone or admire them, you can easily make them happy by telling them how you feel. Whether it's someone close to you or a complete stranger in the street, don't shy away from expressing how you feel and be generous with your compliments!

be on the lookout for the lessons

Whether I am a supertaster or just absolutely crazy about food, I also have a problem eating too fast. When reading about solutions to overeating, one of the tips is to consciously try to eat slower. I have a problem with this. An unpleasant dental issue has recently forced me to eat slower and be careful with my bites. At first it was a challenge and a nuisance and I failed to discover the gift in the situation. Later though when I started getting used to it, I saw the lesson. For the first time I could actually eat slowly and chew the food properly, automatically then savouring each bite more. I thought to myself that if the situation resolves itself, I am going to make this new habit stick. Something I would have never discovered otherwise, if the problem hadn't surfaced....

I have the honor to...

Today I am thinking I am lucky to get the chance, another chance to work with Dr. Micle. I feel it's an honor. It's tempting to go through the day sometimes without noticing the opportunities, the gifts, the abundance... to take these things for granted.
Think about where you can consider yourself lucky or what are some situations you feel honored to experience? What does it mean to feel honored - to feel privileged, to show respect and humbleness toward the situation/person and respect yourself for being part of it, to feel happy and thankful for it.

'Today' is a gift you are given

I love the personal connection you get to experience by writing in the eco room. I feel I get to learn from the patients. Last week a kind patient handed us 'martisor' and he said that every morning when he wakes up, he rises from bed with gratitude and says thanks for being given another day, another chance.

Sometimes when things are hard or facing a difficulty, I adopt the attitude of thinking that I am in fact lucky to have the chance to work this situation out. To get another shot, another day here to sort it out. It puts you in a more positive position than if you are thinking of yourself as the victim who has to carry around another burden. Today you are being given another day, one more chance!

I've found

... that the quickiest way to alleviate bad mood is to turn to gratitude as an aid. A few moments of taking a look at WHAT IS RIGHT in your life with awareness and being thankful for everything, everything that seems natural but really isn't, is what it takes to improve bad mood anytime. There, in those moments of gratitude you will find that happiness is in this moment, not a state of mind to achieve later. In those moments of acknowledging everything that is supporting you, you will find peace of mind.

Turn it around

Weldon Long's "Your Quality of Life Depends on the Quality of Your Response" got me thinking of a recent event that happened to a friend. This person has really impressed me with her attitude. She suffered a setback, a misfortunate incident that at first infuriated her. After a little 'grieving', she decided that instead of letting the event knock her down for months to come, she would make the best of the situation. She decided to use this event to do something she has been putting off for a long time. She recognised that the unhappy incident created the perfect opportunity for her to move in on something she has been delaying.
It really always comes down to our individual response to a situation. We can let an unfortunate situation crush us, or we can choose to cut our losses and accept the WHAT IS. From there we can try to see how we can turn the situation to our advantage by noticing the opening where we can be proactive. Either way, it is our choice; who gets the upper hand is our choice.
Are there any situations in your life right now that you are choosing to be upset over so long that you fail to notice the potential gift that is being offered?

Developing new eyes

"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes." Marcel Proust

It took me a chance to go on vacation to break the routine and develop new eyes on the familiar landscapes. I instantly searched for ways to do things differently, to take a different route to town to avoid the everyday routine, to experience the new. But it doesn't take a vacation to set eyes on what is there all the time around you. It seems that our daily grind makes it difficult to notice what's out there, feeling tired can easily suppress our natural desire and curiosity to observe the world around us. We don't get to have full-blown vacation all that often so let's stay aware of this and cultivate our desire every day to see with new eyes and to take the initiative to discover new possibilities in the familiar.

Choose feeling good over achieving

While having goals and wanting to achieve is necessary for a sense of purpose and our self-improvement, it can also be a hindrance to our happiness. It can be another potential pitfall of the 'someday I will be happy... when" syndrome.

We often create goals and work around achieving them, believing they will be the turning point and bring full satisfaction and contentment. We just need to achieve that one more deal so we can be happy. Sometimes deep down we even believe we don't have the right to feel at peace and happy right at this moment yet since we still have work to do to achieve.

But what if achieving is not always the key to happiness. What if the route is much simpler and unfolding right before us. We don't need anything more at this very moment to be happy, to enjoy ourselves. Perhaps we overrate the happiness factor in having another accomplishment under our belt and an easier means to happiness is just enjoying ourselves... in either case, we need to find a way to learn to enjoy ourselves in the middle of a big achieving project.

There will always be more things to do, as Richard Carlson says in his book, our to-do list will never be empty, and there will always be clouds on our horizons, problems that beg to be solved, but we need to learn to put our own enjoyment first sometimes.

the insiduous "You look tired"

I have been hearing the "you look tired" comment said to me and witnessed it being said to other people and every single time it makes my blood boil a little bit more.

How can anyone think the comment "You look tired" is an innocent remark? How can we not see that "You look tired" implies that you don't look so hot, you don't look so fresh. You look tired is a downright insult.

Saying You look tired is just as rude as saying You have gained weight, you look like you have gotten older. It's a puzzle to me. Everytime I point it out that in my opinion it is rude to say it to someone, the defense response is that they were just trying to be sincere.

There's sincerety and there's a basic knowledge of common sense etiquette. There are things you don't say, unless you are flat out trying to hurt someone. It doesn't mean you are lying, but when you come to think about it, how would looking tired be a welcome comment to anyone and not make them think of connotations of not looking so well. So if you want to make the other person feel less than great and make them wonder what could be wrong with them, go ahead and be 'sincere'.